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What should we rent tonight? I am in the process of
reorganizing this page but basically these are movies I saw and enjoyed.
The rating system for this page starts at 5 - a generally good movie that
is worth your time - and goes to 10 - a nearly perfect immortal cinematic
masterpiece. (I will explore movies in the "0 through 4" category
in another page, perhaps sometime when I'm home with the flu... which
is how this page got started.)
Literary and Cinematic Merit
Lord of the Rings Trilogy - 10
These beautiful, thought-provoking masterpieces stand up in every category
of serious movie. As epic storytelling, they are in a class by themselves.
As action movies, they make James Bond movies look like "Mr. Rogers
visits the crayon factory." Acting, directing, special effects, and
the story itself all stand out. Well worth the time investment of nearly
3 hours per episode. These may actually be the best movies ever made.
See the full review here.
Goya in Bordeaux - 9
Spanish director Carlos Saura recounts the dotage of the artist Francisco
De Goya in his exile in Bordeaux, France. Goya's mind is slipping and
the distinction between past and present begins to wear thin. This movie
is beautiful, strange, moving, engrossing.
The Seventh Seal - 8
this movie is just cool. A medieval knight, Antonious Block, holds death
at bay so long as he can keep up a chess game with the spectre. Black
and white, kind of dark, symbolism, a thinker of a movie. No explosions,
some violence, lots of death (plague). Bergman woke up one morning and
said, "I will make a movie that is cool" and this is what he
created.
Blade Runner - 9
Harrison Ford is a burnt-out cop in this future dystopia, forced by circumstances
to apprehend an escaped "artificial person" who proves (almost)
too much for him. Story by Philip K. Dick, who was discovered by Hollywood,
alas, too late to make him rich before he died. Try to see the "director's
cut" version with the much cooler ending.
To Kill A Mockingbird - 8
Gregory Peck is a principled lawyer in the 1930's South, defending a black
man accused of rape. We learn why prejudice is bad, rednecks are dumb
and evil, how children are overwhelmed by the world around them, and why
Gregory Peck totally rules.
12 Angry Men - 7
Henry Fonda leads an all-star cast as a jury wrestles with a murder case.
This 1957 movie is almost in a class with Patch of Blue for intensity,
with a complex and involving story. There was a 1997 remake, but like
so many remakes, why bother when the original was so great?
Flight of the Phoenix - 7
Jimmy Stewart and an all-star cast crash a plane in the North African
desert. One of the guys on the plane is an engineer, so to keep everyone
busy, Stewart has him direct the reassembly of the plane into a smaller
escape planeas everyone battles thirst and hopelessness. Then everyone
finds out the engineer may not exactly be qualified to direct the project...
A Patch of Blue - 10
Elizabeth Hartman stars as a blind girl befriended by Sydney Portier as
she strives to reach beyond the confines of the world her abusive mother
has made for her. This is not a relaxing movie to watch. Full review here.
The Quiet American - 8
Brendan Frasier is a CIA agent under cover as a doctor in 1950's French
Indochina, befriended by a reporter (Michael Caine). A great story, full
of suspense, and based on a particularly sad chapter in world history
which, alas, has a lot of chapters like that. See also: "Full Metal
Jacket." Full review here.
Monsieur Ibrahim - 8
An elderly Muslim shopkeeper (Omar Sharif) befriends a young shoplifter
(Pierre Boulanger) in this Francois Duperyron film set in 1960's Paris.
The young man learns from the older, and comes of age in many ways. The
pace is slow - this is not an action movie, but there's time to think,
a lot to think about, and many humorous moments to enjoy. This movie is
what Finding Forrester would have been if it had been good.
See Also (following)... Unbreakable, Twelve Monkeys, and
The Sixth Sense.
Just For Fun ------------------------------------------------^^Back
to top^^
Monty Python and the Search for the Holy Grail - 10
John Cleese and his merry men prove that the dumbest humour is actually
the funniest. This is the funniest movie ever made. King Arthur and his
round table knights seek the Holy Grail, facing fierce monsters, supernatural
foes, and a killer rabbit! Sharp pointy teeth! Genius idiocy.
Life of Brian - 8
you thought that Jesus fellow was the most interesting story from his
time, but there was another, far more enlightened (or befuddled: I can't
remember which) one in the Monty Python tradition. Blasphemous humor.
Back To The Future trilogy - 7
Michael J. Fox and Christopher Lloyd travel through time in a souped-up
DeLorean, messing up the past, present, and future. These are fun movies
- nothing more.
Wayne's World - 7
speaking of the genius of dumb humor, this movie just keeps on giving.
Set in Aurora, Illinois, two losers try to make their mark on the world.
Guest appearance by Alice Cooper - "We're not worthy!!!" You
can show this one to your kids.
War Games - 6
Matthew Broderick and Ally Sheedy try to prevent an impending armageddon
that Broderick has unwittingly triggered hacking a DOD computer. This
is a fun suspense-thriller that still holds up.
Houseboat - 5
a romance between Cary Grant and Sophia Loren. [Editor's Note: Sophia
Loren is the hottest woman ever to grace the silver screen. Don't argue.)
You can show this one to your kids - they will enjoy the story while you
lust after Sophia Loren. Very funny scene where a house gets hit by a
train. Did I mention that Sophia Loren is in it?
Amelie - 7
Audrey Tautou is a mischievous and intelligent young woman living in Paris,
who falls in love with a mystery man. This is a fun movie, full of fantasy,
humor, and intrigue.
Bubba Hotep - 7
Bruce Campbell and Ossie Davis play men who believe they are, respectively,
Elvis Presley and John F. Kennedy wasting away in a Texas nursing home.
A series of unexplained deaths and strange occurences lead them to discover
an ancient Egyptian soul-devouring mummy preying on the residents, and
they have to battle the thing to save themselves and their fellow residents.
OK, this is not a serious movie, and it isn't fast-paced or action-packed.
Mostly it's two very good actors in that all-too-rare kind of story, the
bittersweet comedy.
Ghostbusters - 7
This movie is FUNNY as two scientists and a con artist battle the underworld.
Slime, smartass comments (Bill Murray! Dan Ackroyd! Yeah!), an idiot bureaucrat,
and a supernatural showdown. See this movie, kids. Do NOT see the sequel.
Backdraft - 6
Ron Howard directs this cool action hero flick about firefighters and
an arsonist. Intense!
Batman: the Animated Series - 7
not a movie (though there are a couple movies in it) but a great TV animated
series that got the Batman thing exactly right and all the characters
exactly right in the spirit of the original comic. You can show them to
your kids. Don't bother with the live-action "Batman Movies"
starring various embarrassed actors as Batman - they suck.
Groundhog Day - 6
Bill Murray must live one day over and over until he gets it right. Love
interest Andie McDowell and a whole town full of others are trapped in
the cycle with him, but he is the only one who knows it. Funny, maybe
a little Buddhist. See this movie. [A similar plot is the made-for-tv
movie "12:01" which was very good.]
The Apostle -6
Robert Duvall is a complicated evangelist on the road to perdition, Farah
Fawcett his abused wife. He kills a guy, runs from the law. Duvall had
to put $5m of his own money to get this movie made. It's a great story,
but I wish he'd put a little more and gotten a better sound engineer.
It would help understanding the movie.
Fantasia - 8
just a lot of cool music and animation. No plot at all. I especially liked
the dinosaur part. Kids.
Star Wars: the original three movies - 7
Star Wars, Empire Strikes Back, and Return of the Jedi. None of that gay
over-computerized crap that came along later. Just the original three
that were a lot of fun. Empire was the best of the three. Kids.
Indiana Jones 1st and 3d movies - 6
Harrison Ford plays an archeologist against Nazis trying to get cosmic
power. Show it to your kids, enjoy it yourself. Skip the second movie.
Falling Down - 6
Michael Douglass plays an unemployed tech-sector worker having a REALLY
bad day. Cool old cop Robert Duvall has to stop him before he does something
he'll really regret. Not for little kids.
Erin Brockovich - 6
Julia Roberts plays an ex-beauty queen working for a lawyer, fighting
a power company on behalf of people injured by pollution. A fun movie
based on a true story, a real person.
Will Smith ------------------------------------------------^^Back
to top^^
I like Will Smith: he's intelligent and funny. He also shows signs of
being able to act, so his career might take some unpredictable turns in
the future. (Although getting away from action-hero roles can be difficult
as Harrison Ford would attest.)
Independence Day - 7
Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum play a fighter jock and a scientist out to
save the Earth from marauding aliens. Cool scenes of the white house blowing
up, and a fighter-jet/UFO chase scene. But none of those things are important
- it's the Will Smith wit, and Jeff Goldblum realizing he can interface
his Apple Macintosh with the alien computer system that makes it all worthwhile.
Men In Black - 7
Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones play special agents chasing a giant alien
cockroach before an Earth-destroying deadline arrives. It's hard to decide
who is funnier- Smith, Jones, or the cockroach played by Vincent D'Onofrio.
It's all in the dialog, folks. This is great stuff.
Ali - 7
Will Smith is prizefighter Cassius Clay (Muhammed Ali) in a moving story
about the career of the famous fighter. This movie floats like a butterfly,
stings like a bee.
Arnold Schwarzenegger -----------------------
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I will probably get a lot of Arnold fans mad at me here, but he really
isn't much of an actor. This isn't any impediment to making very entertaining
and sometimes excellent movies - when the role is well-chosen. Bill Paxton
is an actor, Arnold Schwarzenneger is a screen personality.
The Last Action Hero - 6
Yes, I know it got bad reviews, but this Schwarzenegger flick was too
intelligent for most of the critics and the audience. Basically, Arnold
makes fun of the action movie genre. Turned out people didn't want to
see his intelligent side. Perhaps the punishment for the commercial failure
of this excellent movie is that he was eventually elected governor of
California.
True Lies - 6
Arnold takes another crack at making fun of the action movie genre. Simpler
plot, more obvious humor than Last Action Hero, so critics and audiences
loved it. A good movie and very entertaining. Arnold must have sighed
and rolled his eyes before setting this one in motion: "Ahh, very
vell, iff da movie fans vant a dumbed down verhsion, I vill giff it to
them."
The Terminator - 7
a pretty waitress (Sarah Conner, played by Linda Hamilton) is targeted
by a robot assassin from the future, intent on preventing the birth of
her son who will one day lead humans to victory over the robots. The resistance
sends a soldier back in time to defend her, and he ends up fathering that
very child. (Picture the robots saying, "Doh!") Linda Hamilton,
not Arnold, is the star of this movie - a tremendous performance,
along with Michael Biehn as the future soldier, Reece. There's LOTS of
violence, profanity,a sex scene, and Arnold introduces his trademark phrase,
"Ill be back!" In the end Conner crushes the robot in a huge
industrial machine, with a memorably obscene putdown that I shan't reveal
here. I cannot recommend this movie too highly. This is pure 200-proof
'80's movie ass-kickery.
Terminator II: Judgment Day - 8
One of the few sequels to anything that was even better than the original,
which already ruled. Good and evil robots from the future duke it out
while pretty waitress-turned-psycho-badass Conner saves soon-to-be-world-leader
teenage son John (see sex scene from previous movie) from the evil robot.
Lots more stuff blows up and plenty of smartass Arnold lines. In this
movie as in the first, Linda Hamilton, not Arnold, is the star, along
with a great performance by Edward Furlong as her son John and Robert
Patrick as the bad terminator. I also enjoyed Earl Boen as the psychiatrist
at the mental institution where Sarah Conner was incarcerated. (There's
a Terminator III, but trust me, don't bother.)
Star Trek ----------------------- ^^Back
to top^^
Star Trek movies are kind of dorky, but they're fun when not taken seriously.
Some of them are quite good and some of them are a crashing bore - basically
the difference is how much influence William Shatner had over the directing
of the episode. Shatner belongs in front of the camera, not behind it.
Here are the ones I enjoyed:
Star Trek 2: The Wrath of Kahn - 6
based on an original Trek episode where Kirk maroons badass Ricardo Montalban
on a desert planet, this episode kicks tons of ass. Great spaceship battle
and lots of great Shatner overacting.
Star Trek 4: - 6
The Voyage Home - Kirk must save the world by going back into time and
getting some live whales. Yes, that's the plot. Very funny - they must
have had a ball with this one.
Star Trek 6: - 6
The Undiscovered Country - the Klingons are in trouble when their Chernobyl
reactor blows up (uh, I mean their moon Praxis, but it was obviously modeled
on the Soviets and Chernobyl) and a peace conference is called. Kirk must
save the Federation by stopping an assassination. Lots of classic character
lines and the movie kicks lots of ass.
Bruce Willis ---------------------------------------------
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Bruce Willis made his mark originally as an action hero, but he is a
tremendous actor and has been in some very fine movies.
Die Hard With A Vengeance - 6
Bruce Willis is a NY cop sent on a goose-chase by a mad bomber of mysterious
intent. He is joined by shopkeeper Samuel L. Jackson as they unravel the
bomber's real plot.
Twelve Monkeys - 8
Bruce Willis is a convict sent back in time to discover the origens of
an apocalyptic plague that devastated Earth, and is hospitalized as insane.
Brad Pitt is an environmental terrorist suspected of causing the plague.
The only time-travel movie ever to get time travel "right" -
that is, you can't change what has already happened because as a time
traveller you were a part of it. Based on a 1962 French movie, "La
Jetee" that presents the same story almost entirely in frozen
pictures - see both movies if you can.
Unbreakable - 8
Bruce Willis is a security guard who mysteriously survives a train wreck
in which everyone else is killed. He is stalked by a disabled man (Samuel
L. Jackson) obsessed with comic book heroes and villains. Tremendous acting,
great story.
The Sixth Sense - 8
Bruce Willis is a psychiatrist treating a child who (1) believes he sees
dead people, and (2) believes he helps them accept the fact of their deaths.
Tremendous acting, great story.
Honorable Mention --------------------------------------^^Back
to top^^
Jurassic Park - 5
Jeff Goldblum tries to save some children from being eaten by genetically
recreated dinosaurs in a movie about very, very bad zookeeping. An awesome
John Williams musical score, and hey, you can't go wrong with children
being chased by monsters. There's also a scene where a lawyer sitting
on a toilet is eaten by a dinosaur. Don't bother with the sequels.
The Hunchback of Notre Dame - 5
Disney animated version. Hate Disney? Too bad - this one was cool because
of amazing animation, and the bad guy was really evil - a psycho-sexual
arsonist in clerical garb. Smart tough damsel, male hero kind of an idiot.
Hunchback kept hallucinating that the gargoyle statues were talking to
him. Saccahrine sweet ending, but whaddya expect with Disney? Kids.
I also liked Beauty and the Beast - 5
Thoroughly obnoxious bad guy, smart damsel, dumb hero, saccharine sweet
ending, amazing animation. Mainly worth it for the bad guy, though I loved
the musical numbers. Show it to your kids.
Kubrick ---------------------------------------------
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2001: A Space Odessey - 9
the best space movie ever made, thought provoking, beautiful, symbolic,
but be warned, it is not action-packed. Be ready to sit quietly and absorb
long sequences with no dialog and slowly developing story. Be ready to
think long and hard about what it all means. Be ready to read the book.
Dr. Strangelove - 10
the end of the world in comedy form. Peter Sellers plays three characters;
a British Colonel, the US President, and a mad scientist. George C. Scott
plays a hot-shot American general. But every character is just great,
the story is sharp as hell, and I will never get tired of watching this
movie. See also: "Twelve Monkeys"
Clockwork Orange - 9
set in 1960's/future England, a sociopath is given a chance for "scientific
rehabilitation." Another example of dark Kubrick perfection. You
wind up rooting for the sick bastard played by Malcom McDowell.
Full Metal Jacket - 9
Kubrick visits Vietnam as recruits cling to their humanity in an inhuman
world. Funny, tragic, can't take your eyes off it. See also: "The
Quiet American."
Hitchcock ---------------------------------------------
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North By NorthWest - 7
Hitchcock sends Cary Grant on a smart action-suspense-thriller comedy.
Bet you never saw a man on foot chased by an airplane before. Also imagine
climbing Mt. Rushmore... in the dark while a guy is trying to shoot you.
Lots of good lines
Vertigo - 6
Hitchcock puts Jimmy Stewart up against a psycho-killer-lady. Long sequences
with no dialog, great for San Francisco lovers, suspense-thriller.
Rear Window - 6
Hitchcock puts Jimmy Stewart up against a psycho-killer-dude. Stewart
witnesses a crime ... maybe ... but no one will believe him and he has
to figure it out from his wheelchair.
The Birds - 6
Hitchcock pits a village against psycho birds. You'll never look at flocks
of birds the same way again.
Psycho - 6
Hitchcock pits a guy against a psycho... well, that's it. Famous shower
scene. Ultra cool ending.
Way Out Of Bounds
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Killer Condom - 6
a gay Italian cop in New York chases an evil mastermind who has developed
a carniverous condom, in this German parody of American cop movies. (Movie
is in German, with English subtitles) Sick humor.
Orgazmo - 5
an innocent young man from Utah unwittingly becomes the world's first
Mormon Missionary PornStar Superhero in this parody of the porn industry.
Madcap fun ensues when his very straight-laced Mormon fiance finds out!
Sick, blasphemous humor.
8mm - 7
Nicholas cage plays a detective trying to sort out the truth about a 'snuff
film' in which a young girl is killed. Intense, suspense, action, violence,
bad stuff. Great movie.
Bowling for Columbine - 7
Documentarian satirist Michael Moore explores the hysteria that followed
the shootings at the Littleton, CO high school, discussing the American
"culture of fear." It was a lot more interesting and even-handed
than I expected. Full review here.
Fahrenheit 911 - 7
Michael Moore pushes the boundaries of credulity even further as he connects
the dots leading up to the Sept. 11 attacks and the hysteria that followed.
This movie is definitely worth seeing, but if you are a Bush fan, you
won't like it. Full review here.
discussion ------------------------------------------------^^Back
to top^^
You can often tell how good popular movies are by how often they are
parodied on "The Simpsons" or in MAD magazine. But that's not
much of a guide for little-known or very new movies. And parody alone
is not an assurance of quality: The Matrix has been endlessly parodied,
but other than its special effects (big hairy deal) it's just an overblown
Twilight Zone episode.
Earth to Hollywood: special effects are nice, but that's ALL they are!
In themselves they don't really do much for a movie. A good movie contains
at least one of the following: a really good story, good writing, acting,
directing, lighting, cinematography, editing (so the movie makes sense),
music, and sound (a murky sound track really reduces a movie.) The more
of those elements found in a movie, the more likely it is a great movie.
Some great movies can be extremely hard to find, like "Goya in Bordeaux"
or "La Jetee." Try to find a video store that specializes in
the unusual. This will be run by an individual who loves movies, not some
national chain.
This list deliberately omits some critically acclaimed movies, and some
that did very well at the box office, for one important reason: I
didn't like them! For example, "Signs" got all kinds of
critical approval, but the story didn't hold together and the main character's
motivation was lame. Character motivation is crucial to a story. Some
shred of attempt at scientific credibility helps too - keep the audience
need for "suspension of disbelief" to a minimum. Usually I can
spot a really bad movie at a distance and stay away, but occasionally
wind up watching one - I may do a "bad movies" page next time
I'm home with the flu.
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